Top 20 Stupid Questions

There was a recent study done by somebody somewhere that the most viewed items on the internet (I am assuming other than porn) is "Top Ten Lists". Maybe we can thank David Letterman for that, but regardless, if the study was done, and stated on the internet - than it MUST be true - therefore, as traffic to my site means, ads being clicked, means I make money  - then here is a list I created a couple of years ago that anyone who has ever performed music will relate to, and for those that have watched and interacted with a performer, you too may see some items that you thought were original when speaking with the performer.


TOP 20 QUESTIONS I GET ASKED WHEN PERFORMING

Q: Where does the name ``My Other Brother Darryl” (what I call my band) come from?
A: If you have to ask that you are not going to recognize three quarters of my set list.

Q: There is no Jagermeister left, you seem to have had it all, what else would you like to have instead?

A: That’s easy, I will have some Jagermeister

Q: Will you play “Bobby McGee”
A: No

Q: Do you know that you can’t sleep here?
A: Just have the cleaning staff clean around me, thank you

Q: Why do you have so much sound equipment, with just you playing?
A: It make me feel important, and it is nice to know that if the mood strikes I can break every window in a three block radius.

Q: Have you won any awards?
A: I won a “Most Sportsmanlike” trophy for bowling when I was in grade 3

Q: Are you almost done tuning your guitar?
A: Jezuz, I am three songs into my setlist

Q: Can I have $40 for Gas?
A: Go away Lincoln (my son), I am gigging here

Q: Have you seen my freshly opened beer I set on the stage here?
A: Nope

Q: When I asked you for a request an hour ago, you said that you need to remember it and you would play it later
A: I have no idea how to play it, I was just hoping you would have left by now.

Q: What motivates you to get up alone and play all night
A: NB Liquor Commission

Q: You know you missed a chord in that last song
A: Sorry, what song was that... I was daydreaming

Q: May I have your autograph
A: May I have your wallet

Q: How much do you charge?
A: How much you got?

Q: Will you play at a party where there are children present
A: Only if you agree to pay for their therapy later in life

Q: Will you play something by Justin Beiber?
A: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Q: What happens when you forget the words to a song?
A: I read the lips of the crowd

Q: That song did not sound like Pink Floyd you know?
A: Pink Floyd does not sound like me

Q: Can I get up and sing a few songs
A: As long as you don’t mind if I sit down and drink and get paid for it

Q. Do you keep playing when a fight breaks out?
A. Wanna find out?